I could talk about Tropic Thunder, which I saw over the weekend; about the story, stronger than Pineapple Express with a similar smattering of laughs; the acting, pretty good in most respects; the script, which needed some work, or the direction, which exceeded that of the usual for the genre. But unfortunately, though I saw the movie, I could barely concentrate on it.
The reason for my difficulty in absorbing the film was the manner in which I viewed it. After a week of excitement about attending the new, state of the art, Cinema De Lux experience at Showcase Cinemas, Patriot Place in Foxboro, MA, we had finally arrived. The exterior was striking, sporting flashing blue lights reminiscent of theatres at the best of city locations. The lobby was sizable, offering the usual Cinema De Lux amenities such as the standard Concession Stand, mini bar and grill restaurant, Nathan’s, Ben and Jerry’s and Familigia Pizza.But what really differentiated this place from the prior incarnations of the model, what I was really looking forward to, was the Lux level: a segregated, ticket-holders only area, with a bar, lounge seating, and even an in-auditorium private seating area, complete with leather, rocking love-seats, on-demand waiters and all manner of snacks, from standard concession fare, to pizza, wings, sundaes, beer and mixed drinks. It was new and intriguing. It was posh and exclusive.
It was sold out. That’s right, Saturday night at 5:30PM when we arrived, it was already sold out. Well, we’ve all been there before, and as it turns out there are only about 55 seats in the Lux level of each applicable auditorium. Even at an upcharge of over $8.00 per ticket, apparently demand exceeded supply. Perhaps we should have bought tickets on-line. Instead of sitting around, complaining about it, we bought tickets for the standard 7PM performance, and took a seat at Studio 3, the mini bar and grille to the right of the main entrance.
We ordered drinks, which arrived promptly, and perused the menu for appetizers and entrees. Unfortunately it was all down hill from there. Our waitress seemed to be circling our table, but avoiding us, and it took 20 minutes before she finally showed up to take our order. “There was only one cook in the kitchen for a while,” she explained. “I didn’t want to keep you waiting.”
We all pondered that in confusion, while ordering a few appetizers and our entrees. Thirty minutes later, now 6:20PM, our neighbors, who had sat down a good 20 minutes after us, received an appetizer, one of the same we had ordered. We had still received none. Our drinks were now almost empty, never having been refilled, and our waitress still circled our table, avoiding eye contact at all costs.
When we finally got a hold of her again, she said the kitchen was still backed up. She offered us a plate of mini-hamburgers, which she said her manager told her to bring out. When we asked about her appetizers, she pretended she hadn’t realized they hadn’t come out, and promptly offered to take them off our bill, as our meals were just now being prepared. We accepted, now very hungry, and awaiting the arrival of our entrees.
They never came. Another 20 minutes passed. Our drinks were now absolutely empty. We sought out management in the lobby, as our movie start time had now passed, and were given an apology, our money back, free passes for the next show, and free passes for next time. We paid to upgrade to the Lux level for this performance, and started to feel a little better, hoping the second half of the evening would be better than the first.
On the way back to the restaurant, I passed the Nathan’s, which adjoined the exterior of Studio 3. I noticed that our waitress was there, and realized this was where our food was being cooked. Cooling burgers, sandwiches and fries were sitting piled up here and there. The grill was dormant and a confused, twenty-something cook was having a heated discussion with another manager.
We got back to our table, and continued to wait. Nothing was coming out of the kitchen now. The waitress finally came back with a bill fold and an exasperated frown. The kitchen was still backed up. We could pay for our drinks and leave, or we could stay, and get our meal on the house. As we were now looking at a 9:50PM start time for our film, we said we’d stay. We were a little surprised that they had expected us to leave, and still settle our drink tab (which amounted to $6.00, as we had only ordered water and soda so far). They were also unaware we had talked to a manager in the lobby. In other words, they were offering us nothing for the abysmal service, not even an apology, or our $6.00 worth of drinks on the house. At this point, we were determined to get our meals, to get something in our stomachs, and we now had plenty of time to wait.
Still no food came. It had now been more than two hours since we sat down. We heard the waitress ask the manager (a different one from the man we had spoken with earlier) who had finally shown up in the restaurant to speak with angry customers, if we still wanted our food. He said he didn’t know. No one came to speak to us. The waitress came back 10 minutes later and said, “You didn’t still want your food did you?”
“YES,” we replied. But the waiting went on. The manager came back and explained that when our order was credited off of our bill, leaving only the drink tab, it had also been taken out of the system. There was no way during this time, that there was any chance it would be made. He apologized. We glared.
Everyone had left now, but we really had nowhere else to go. The waitress came back and told us the manager was making the food himself. After another fifteen minutes we got our platters. My burger was a cold, black, hockey puck. My wife’s salad had the wrong dressing, and the couple we were with was mixed on their opinion of the browned, steak subs.
It was a perfectly horrific end to the worst dining experience of my life. On the way out, I asked the hostess what had gone wrong, as we had never gotten an explanation. “They were down to one cook for a while,” she said. We fled to the Lux level.
It was nice, but it was hard to fully enjoy. We got some food, which we had to pay for of course, and relaxed in the lounge area. When our theatre was ready, we sat in the large, plush rockers, and waited for our movie to start. A young guy came around to take our orders on some sort of digital device. Our tickets had come with a food voucher, so we ordered a pizza, popcorn and a drink.
The pizza came right away. Though it was doughy and undercooked in the middle, it was warm and I was still hungry. Unfortunately, I got very thirsty. As waiters passed in and out of the rows of seats, continually blocking our view of the trailers, I began to wonder when the drink and popcorn would be coming. By the time it arrived, 20 minutes had passed and the movie had begun. What remained of my pizza was now cold.
As rain poured down, we walked out of the Patriot Place Cinema De Lux, a few hours later. What had seemed like such a great concept, was obviously greatly flawed in operation. We all agreed, it was by far and away, the worst movie-going or dining experience we had ever had.
Lack of communication was the number one problem. I would have been happier if our waitress had come to us after a half-hour, and said, which I am sure she was certain of at that time, “You won’t be getting any food tonight. Our operation has had an entire meltdown. Your drinks will be on the house, and here’s a free pass for next time. We’re sorry.”
That, at the very least, would have been honest and acceptable.
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